King Scoopa Koopa
by Nintendo Maximus
Summary: In yet another cartoon novelization, Bowser starts up a fast food stand. Nearly everyone goes to this restaurant for lunch, but are those Chicken eggs in the Corona Pockets?


**Disclaimer:** I mean, Super Mario Bros. is not my property. You know who _does_ own it.

**Author's Note:** I decided that since _Super Mario Advance 4_ won't be coming out until September, I could wait a while to start on the "Super Koopa" novelization. In the meantime, I wrote this fanfic novelization, this one of the Super Mario World cartoon episode of the same name! This time around, however, Wario and Waluigi aren't adding to the storyline, but I've still added in characters never featured in the cartoons, and fixed up all plot holes. Bon appetìt!

* * *

"Ohhhhh, not-a rabbit food again-a!" Mario Mario groaned.

It was lunchtime in the Mushroom Kingdom. Mario and his brother Luigi were having lunch at Princess Peach Toadstool's castle. Peach had just served them sandwiches as her loyal butler, Toadsworth, looked on from his seat.

"Oh, c'mon," Peach urged. "It's good for you, Mario!"

"Yes, it makes a body grow," added Toadsworth. "Wait a minute, isn't that what they say in the milk moustache advertising campaign? No no, I think they ditched that slogan years ago..."

"Yeah?" Mario griped, ignoring Toadsworth's monologue. "Well, answer me this, then! How come everything I don't a-like is a-good for me, and everything I do isn't-a?"

Peach giggled. "You sound just like Yoshi!"

Mario looked around. "Hmm, speaking of a-Yoshi, where is he? He never misses lunch-a!"

"Neither do you, unless you're in trouble." Luigi looked around, and then suddenly, a striking realization hit him in the head like a horseshoe being dropped on a bull's head. "Mama mia! Where's a-Daisy?" he gasped, referring to Princess Daisy of Sarasaland.

"Hmmm," said Toadsworth. "Master Luigi, I would say that your girlfriend is probably over at wherever Yoshi is."

Suddenly, the four of them heard a roar from outside. Mario got up from his seat and looked out the window. "Something's going on in the middle of Toad Town! We gotta check this out!"

Mario, Luigi, Peach, and Toadsworth ran out of Peach Castle and headed into the town square of Toad Town. What they saw was a big shocker to the four of them. A new outdoor restaurant had been built near Rowf's Badge Shop. A big banner hung in front of the site for this restaurant. Below, Bowser Jr., the youngest son of the evil King Bowser Koopa, walked around, holding a plate of food. He was wearing a fast food hat.

Mario read the banner. "Grand Opening - Scoopa Koopa's Fast Food!" He looked at the miniature Bowser standing there. "What's a-going on around here?"

"Ah," Bowser Jr. stopped walking around. "Papa and I expected you to show up, Mario."

"What's a-the meaning of this-a, Prince Koopa?" Mario called Bowser Jr.

"It's our new fast food restaurant, pal!" Bowser Jr. said. "And to celebrate our grand opening, we're givin' out free samples! See the sign?"

Mario looked at the banner and read the rest of it. "'Free Samples'?"

"That's right; _free!_" Bowser Jr. pointed to a sandwich on the plate of food he was holding. "Try this! We call it a Corona Pocket!"

Luigi plucked the so-called Corona Pocket out of Bowser Jr.'s plate and took a bite out of it. "Mmm, egg! Teesh-delish!"

"Egg?" Mario threw his hands in front of him like someone expressing their opinion on something they found icky. "Eeeyuck-a! But I think I know where we'll a-find a-Yoshi."

Yoshi wasn't the only one they noticed in the line in front of the fast food stand. Also among the people in the line were Wario Wario and Waluigi Wario, the Goomba Family from Goomba Village, the Nimbus Family of Nimbus Land, the good people of Seaside Town, and of course, Princess Daisy.

"Daisy!" Luigi ran up to her. "How come you didn't a-come to the castle for lunch-a?"

Daisy gave him a friendly slap. "You know I hate carrots and peppers."

Yoshi was very close to the front of the line. In fact, he was next in line for ordering his food. A Koopa Troopa stood behind the counter, playing the role of a cashier. Russ T. paid him some Coins, and the Koopa Troopa handed him the food he had paid for. Yoshi stepped up to the counter. The Koopa Troopa cashier rolled his eyes to his boss. King Bowser Koopa himself was in the kitchen in the back, and he was wearing a chef's hat and an apron. He could obviously tell that the Troopa was telling him, "Hey boss! It's one of those dinosaurs that gave you the what's-for when you were a tot!" Bowser hand-signaled the Troopa to just go on with his business.

"Welcome to the Rocket Restaurant," said the Koopa Troopa. "Can I take your order?"

"Yes." Yoshi looked at the menu above and made his selection. "I'll have six coconut shakes, twelve orders of papaya fries, and eight Egg Corona Pockets!"

"That's our menu," said the Koopa Troopa.

"That's my order," replied Yoshi.

The Koopa Troopa turned to the kitchen. "Six coconut shakes! Twelve papya fries! Eight Corona Pockets!" he yelled. "On the double!"

In the kitchen, a group of Chickens (the enemies dispensed by the sub-boss Biokinton), hearing the Koopa Troopa's command, laid some eggs on the conveyor belt that they were perched above.

[**Author's Note:** Biokinton is the cloud you fight before facing Tatanga in _Super Mario Land_.]

"Eight Egg Corona Pockets coming up! Cook 'em good!" Bowser called. "No one likes runny eggs, Reznor-brain!"

At one part of the conveyor belt, Roy Koopa broke the eggshells and threw them into a nearby warp pipe. He then cued a Reznor to breathe fire on the yolk, which it did.

A Rex waited at the end of the conveyor belt. He scooped the egg yolk into buns with a spatula.

"Hey, don't forget the special Scoopa Sauce!" he heard Bowser calling. "A little scoop'll do ya, ha ha!"

The Rex groaned and grabbed some moldy vegetables sitting on a nearby table. He then squeezed the juice out of them onto the sandwich. When he had finished, he threw the used vegetables down a warp pipe.

"Hurry up with those fries!" Bowser ordered.

Larry Koopa stood near a fryer filled with the greasy liquid. He picked up some potatoes and sliced them with his claws. The potato slices fell into the fryer, which was then heated by a Dino-Torch. Looking around to make sure no one was looking, Larry snatched a fry out of the fryer.

"Hey, no eating off the profits!" Larry was about to eat the fry when he heard Bowser say that. "Do it, and it's comin' out of your paycheck!"

Larry immediately put the fry back.

"Shake it up!" Bowser ordered. "Time is money!"

Wendy O Koopa, Bowser's only daughter, shook a coconut and sliced it in half with her fingernails. She put a straw and a piece of lemon in both halves, making two coconut shakes. But since Yoshi had ordered for six coconut shakes, she had to do this again twice.

"Ha ha ha ha ha! What a deal!" Bowser chortled as he watched his offspring and troops work in the kitchen. "Not only will I make Egg Corona Pocket addicts out of these silly Toads, and make myself filthy rich at the same time..." At this point, he patted on a bag of money. "Ha ha! Just wait'll they discover the side effects! Those bird brains will never know what hit 'em! Ha ha ha ha ha..."

Over at the counter, the Koopa Troopa cashier kept hold of Yoshi's food while the green Struthiomimus moved around, looking for Coins.

"Give us your money! That's what we want!" the Koopa Troopa demanded. "Uh... I mean... please deposit your pay."

"Sorry, um, I forgot my money," Yoshi apologized.

"What?!" The Koopa Troopa called to his commander. "Hey boss! This dinosaur ain't paying for his order!"

Bowser walked up to the green specimen of dinosaur that had twice ruined his evil plans as a baby. "You little dino dweeb!! What do you think this, a charity operation? I oughta make special Scoopa Sauce out of you!"

Mario stepped up, angry with Bowser. "Step off-a, you nasty scaled a-bully! What's he owe-a?"

The Koopa Troopa gave him the answer. "Every order is 100 smackeroos, flange-face. Absolutely no credit to actors, writers, Toads, dinosaurs, Piantas, Nokis, professors, worms, ghosts, moles, Goombas, clouds, penguins, Kongs, Pikmin, Hylians, Kokiris, Gorons, Zoras, Gerudos, Star Fox Team members, F-ZERO racers, psychic kids from Eagleland, Pokémon trainers, Game Masters, Galactic Police, pink marshmallows, Ice Climbers, Super Power Club members..." Bowser, getting tired of the Troopa's listing, bopped him on the head at that point, which was an immediate signal for the cashier to just finish his sentence. "Ow! ...Or plumbers!"

"100 Coins-a?" Mario objected. "I call a-that highway robbery!"

"Well, _I_ call it in inflation!" Bowser said aloud. _In more ways than one!_ he thought to himself. _Wait till the calories start pilin' up on his waist line!_

Mario took 100 Coins out of his wallet and handed them to Bowser. "Hmmm-a, I smell a rat a-here, Bowser," he said as the Koopa Troopa handed him Yoshi's food.

"That's not rat you smell, it's my special Scoopa Sauce!" Bowser laughed. He placed an extra Corona Pocket on top of the food. "Here, compliments of da chef!"

***

Several minutes later, Mario, Luigi, Yoshi, Peach, Daisy, and Toadsworth were having lunch at a park near Pleasant Path. The Mario Bros., Yoshi, and Daisy were all gobbling down the food that Mario had paid for. But Peach wasn't touching any of the food, and seeing how Peach wasn't eating, Toadsworth wasn't either.

"It's a good-a thing you don't a-like eggs-a, Mario," Luigi said between bites. "It a-leaves a-more for me-a!" Daisy glared at him at that point. "_And_ a-Daisy! These Corona Pockets are a-fabuloso!"

"And they taste good too!" Yoshi added.

Mario offered some papaya fries to the object of his affec--I mean, Peach. "You oughta try a-some of these, Peach-a! The shakes and a-fries are a-great-a!"

Peach let out a disgusted groan, and flipped some of the fries out of Mario's hands. "No way! I wouldn't put anything that Bowser had his dirty claws on! Ho boy, I'm saying something I'd probably expect to hear from Daisy."

"Give it a rest-a, Peach!" Mario urged, dipping a fry in ketchup. "You're a-falsely accusing Bowser the way Tiff does to King Dedede and Escargoon on 'Kirby: Right Back at Ya!' Who knows-a? Maybe he finally decided to earn an honest buck for a change-a!"

"Yes, you never know," Toadsworth added.

After a while, Mario, Luigi, Yoshi, and Daisy had finished up all their food, and they looked pretty bloated. Well, actually, the Mario Bros. and Yoshi were the ones who looked fatter than they were when they had started eating. It wouldn't be a pretty picture to see Daisy with a weight gain.

"I'd a-say he's a-got a gold mine here-a!" Mario theorized as he threw the food wrappers away.

Yoshi burped. "Ooh, excuse me."

"My sentiments exactly, Yoshi," said Daisy.

"Mine too!" agreed Luigi. "How about another a-round, brother-mio?"

"Let's a-go!" Mario raised his balled-up right hand. "I still have a few hundred or so Coins left."

The two plumbers, the green Struthiomimus, and the tomboyish brunette all headed back to Bowser's restaurant. Peach and Toadsworth watched the four walk off, the remnants of the food bouncing in their stomachs.

"Why didn't Bowser make vitamins first and fast food second?" Peach asked with a worried tone.

"Hmmm... Bowser Koopa Megavitamins..." Toadsworth tried to picture it. "Nope, I don't think that would be a very good idea, either!"

Neither the princess nor the butler noticed that they were being watched. A pair of eyes darted away from the nearby bushes before Toadsworth could notice them.

***

A week passed. Everyone in the Mushroom Kingdom kept buying food from Scoopa Koopa's. And there was some uncontrollable thing about the Corona Pockets in particular that was making them want more and more of them. And Princess Peach was getting more and more worried about this.

And she was sure of it one morning when she and Toadsworth walked into Mario and Luigi's House and found a shocking sight. Mario was sleeping on top of a pyramid of Scoopa Koopa's food wrappers. Luigi, Yoshi, and Daisy were sleeping in chicken-like poses. All of them were at least a hundred pounds fatter than they were the week before. Luigi stood up and let out a loud "Cock-a-doodle-a-doo!!"

Peach looked at everyone in shock. "Ugh, this is disgusting! You've all been eating nothing but Bowser's junk for days!"

"Yes," Toadsworth added. "I suggest that you all take a break."

Luigi and Yoshi were pecking at the ground, and Daisy was sitting on Luigi's bunk, clucking.

"Bawk!" Luigi bawked. "Luigi hungry!"

"Yoshi _more_ hungry!" Yoshi clucked. "Bawk bawk!"

"Be-caw! Be-caw! Daisy trying to lay egg!" Daisy yelled from the bedroom.

"Stop squawking, the three of you!" Peach commanded. "You sound like birds."

But they didn't stop. Luigi and Yoshi started flapping their arms like as if they were trying to fly. Peach glared at all three of them.

"All right! That does it!" Toadsworth announced. "The Princess has an announcement for all of you."

Peach put her arms to her hip. "Mario! Luigi! Yoshi! Daisy! You're going on a diet, all of you!"

Mario suddenly woke up. "A diet-a? Aw Princess, ol' friend, ol' pal, ol' majesty, ol' girlfriend? Anything but that-a!" He tried to get up, but slipped, and wound up stuck lying on top of the wrappers. "Help me up, would you?"

"Forget it!" Peach yelled. "We're locking the four of you in here until you tear yourselves from the iron grip of Bowser's garbage!"

Mario, Luigi, Yoshi, and Daisy stood up. "Oh no!" Mario groaned. "We'll a-starve-a!"

"Bawk bawk bawk!" Yoshi gobbled. "Oh, Yoshi hate diet!"

"Aaah! Daisy hate carrots and peppers!" Daisy cried. "Cheep-cheep-cheep!"

Not listening to either of their complaints, Peach and Toadsworth walked out, slamming the door behind them and locking it.

"Bee-_cawwwwwwwww!_" Luigi went. "How we gonna survive diet?"

"Don't a-worry, Luigi, I'm a-sure Peach will a-take pity on us and a-let us out-a." Mario went to the sink and started filling a glass of water. "You know, she was a-right about a-one thing-a. You guys _are_ a-starting to sound a-like chickens-a."

A pair of wings sprouted from where Luigi's arms used to be. "Oh, _ rrrrrrrrrraaah_-eally?"

"Yes-a," Mario said as he went to the freezer and took out an ice tray. "And a-looking at the funny positions you were a-sleeping in..."

At this point, Yoshi's green legs turned into those of chickens.

Mario put some ice cubes into his water glass. "...and the way Daisy looked like she was a-trying to lay an egg-a..."

A chicken's beak appeared in place of Princess Daisy's nose during those few seconds.

"...I'd a-say you guys are _acting_ like a-chickens!" Mario was about to gulp down some water when he suddenly heard the sound of approaching feet. He looked around and let out a high-pitched scream, for what he saw was an even bigger shock to him than what Peach and Toadsworth had been shocked by coming in earlier.

Mario's brother and two friends now had wings where their arms once were. Their feet now had three scratching toes, and beaks had grown in place of their noses. The three of them were now wearing aviator's goggles and a helmet each. In other words, Luigi, Yoshi, and Daisy had now become Chickens!

***

Mario awoke from an unconscious faint several minutes later. _Oh, mama mia,_ he thought. _It was only a bad-a dream-a._

Then he suddenly realized something.

_Wait a minute... If I'm a-just waking up-a, what am I doing here on the floor-a? How come I don't see Luigi, Yoshi, or Daisy anywhere now?_ Mario got up and looked in his and Luigi's bedroom on the other side of the house. _And a-where's the Coin-a Chest-a?!_ The Coin Chest was a big treasure chest where Mario and Luigi would put their Coins, Red Coins, and Blue Coins. But now, there was a big empty space where the Coin Chest once sat. Mario put his hand to his chin and puzzled and puzzed till his puzzler was sore. _ Hold on-a... Luigi, Yoshi, and Daisy becoming a-chickens... That was a-no dream-a! And if I didn't a-know better, I'd a-say Peach was right-a about us eating a-Bowser's food-a!_

Without thinking twice, Mario rushed over to the locked door and started banging on it. "Peach! Toadsworth! Let a-me out! Luigi, Daisy, and Yoshi have a-flown the coop-a!"

After a two minutes or so of Mario pounding on it, Peach unlocked and opened the door.

"I say, Master Mario!" Toadsworth said, coming in behind Peach. "What are you banging on the door for?"

"Luigi, Daisy, and Yoshi have a-flown the coop!" Mario said again. "And what's a-worse, they stole our-a Coin Chest-a!"

"What?" Peach was confused. "But how could they do it? The door was locked the whole time."

Mario pointed to the open window near his and Luigi's bunk bed. "Like I said-a, they flew the coop-a!"

"Oh, sure," an unconvinced Peach scoffed. "Like they just grew wings and flew away. Give me a break, Mario!"

"No! I'm serious!" Mario tried to tell her. He turned to the butler and said, "Toadsworth, you stay here-a. I'm a-gonna show the Princess that I mean what I'm a-sayin'."

"OK," Toadsworth said as Mario pulled Peach out the door. "But please make sure the Princess doesn't get hurt!"

As Mario and Peach walked out of the house, the same pair of eyes from earlier watched. As Mario and Peach headed off to Toad Town, the beholder of the eyes darted away, unnoticed.

***

Over at Scoopa Koopa's, Wario and Waluigi were at the front of the current line. This line was very similar to the previous lines, but with one exception. Everyone now had wings, beaks, and feet like Chickens. Not to mention they were wearing goggles and helmets like the Chicken enemies were wearing.

At the back of the line, Luigi, Yoshi, and Daisy showed up, all three of them carrying the Coin Chest. "Boy, am I hungry!" Luigi said, his stomach rumbling.

Bowser Jr. stood in front of the fast food stand. "Patience, our little chickadees! Corona Pockets for everyone! Cash in hand, of course."

From the kitchen, Bowser and his chief Magikoopa, Kamek, watched the people-turned-Chickens stand in line. "Everything's proceeding according to plan, sir," said Kamek. "The Scoopa Sauce in the Corona Pockets are turning everyone into Chickens as we wanted."

"Excellent!" Bowser said. As Kamek walked away, Bowser watched as Luigi, Yoshi, and Daisy handed the Coin Chest over to the Koopa Troopa cashier. "Look at those dumb clucks hand over their life savings for a few brief moments of mouth-watering bliss! But what am I gonna do when all my paying customers have completely become useless Chickens?" He thought for a moment. Then a lightbulb appeared beside his head, as it usually did when he got a wonderful awful idea. "Bowser, you capitalistic fiend! Ha ha, you're a genius! I'll open up... 'Flew the Koopa's Fried Chicken Stand'! Fortune number two, coming up!" As he said that, he pictured a stand similar to his current restaurant, only now the main course was fried chicken. Various enemies of the Mushroom Kingdom were walking up to the restaurant, handing over bags of Coins, and then digging into a nice leg of fried Chicken. "Like they say," Bowser laughed as he ended his fantasy, "you can't be too rich or too evil! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!"

***

Soon after buying their food, Luigi, Yoshi, and Daisy brought it to the park near Pleasant Path.

"Bawk bawk bawk!" Luigi clucked as he and the other two set their food down on the table from last week's meal. "Boy, am I excited!"

But before either of them could dig in, Mario and Peach suddenly came up to the table and grabbed the bags.

"Luigi!" Mario shouted at his brother. "You traded our Coin Chest for this-a?"

"Shame on you!" Peach added.

Then Luigi, Yoshi, and Daisy got mad. They started clucking angrily and flapping their wings repeatedly.

"You make Luigi mad!" Luigi squawked.

"You make Yoshi mad!" Yoshi clucked in unison with Luigi.

"You make Daisy mad!" Daisy buck-bucked at the same time as Luigi and Yoshi.

Peach was startled by the sight in front of her. "Wings? They grew _wings?_"

"_And_ beaks and chicken feet! Didn't I tell you?" Mario said as Luigi, Daisy, and Yoshi flew in an attacking formation at them. The food dropped out of the bags and onto the ground. "And I think I may know where they came a-from - Bowser's a-food!"

"But you ate some of Bowser's food too, Mario!" Peach interrupted. "So why aren't you a Chicken now?"

"It must've been something they were eating that I wasn't-a... namely this-a!" Mario picked up one of the Corona Pockets that had fallen out of the bags. "I don't a-like eggs, and these a-Corona Pockets are stuffed with 'em, so I didn't eat them-a."

Peach looked at the Corona Pocket. "Then that must be what Bowser's using to turn everyone into Chickens!"

"That's it-a!" Mario tossed the Corona Pocket away. "We're-a shutting down Scoopa Koopa's before the damage ez a-permanent!"

"You and who else, Plumb-dumb?" they suddenly heard the voice of Bowser say.

They looked around, and there was Bowser. And his troops and kids weren't the only ones accompanying him. Luigi, Daisy, Yoshi, Wario, Waluigi, and various Toads, all of whom had turned into Chickens, had grouped with him.

"My customers and employees might not agree with you!" Bowser said, walking up to Mario and Peach. "One more day, and it'll be too late! Your friends will go from the fried egg to the fryer! And the next stop is the frying pan." Mario and Peach gasped at that point. Bowser turned to his gang and yelled, "He wants to shut us down, friends! What are you gonna do about it?"

The Chicken-turned people and the Scoopa Koopa's employees' response was immediately given. They started moving toward Mario and Peach, ready for the kill.

"We need a plan-a, quick-a!" Mario said.

"Since we can't fly," Peach suggested, "I say we run!"

The pair ran for it. Bowser watched as his employees and customers gave chase. Mario and Peach were giving their all, but Bowser's boys were closing in on them.

"Well Peach," Mario started to say as the bad guys got an inch within them, "I guess I'd better say something I've a-been keeping a secret for a long time. I..."

But before Mario could make his confession, Peach spotted a nearby Goomnut tree. The two hid behind the Goomnut tree. Bowser's employees were too dumb to notice that they had just ran past their prey.

"What were you trying to say?" Peach asked as they hid from the troops.

"Never mind-a. We need to defeat these guys-a!" Mario ran over to a nearby "?" Block and tried to jump up to it, but it was too high for him to reach. "Peach! Give me a boost here-a!"

Peach spotted a green Springboard behind another Goomnut tree. She ran over to that tree and tossed the Springboard over to Mario. "Catch!"

Mario caught the Springboard and set it down. He then jumped on it and bounced all the way up to the "?" Block. A Fire Flower came out of it. "Ha ha, thanks-a, Peach!" the plumber said as he became Fiery Mario.

Just then, a Koopa Troopa and two Rexes came up to Peach. "Ah-ha! Princess Peach!" said the Koopa Troopa. "King Bowser tells me he's always wanted you in his family! Let's get 'er, boys!"

That's when Fiery Mario came between them and Peach. "Not on your life-a, Koopa Stoopas!" Mario shot the trio with fireballs, and the bad guys evaporated into Coins.

Then some of the Chicken-Toads flew towards the pair.

"Stand back, sweetheart!" Mario shouted, preparing to throw fireballs. "I'm a-takin' out the trash!"

"No! Don't!" Peach stopped him. "They may be turned into Chickens under Bowser's control, but they're still our friends."

Suddenly, a big fireball hit the both of them, causing Peach to fall down and Mario to lose his Fire Power. He ran over to the fallen Princess and slapped at her. "Peach! Wake up-a! Are you okay?"

"Yes, I'm okay," Peach said, getting up. "But I don't feel like I'm in the mood for attacking..."

There, from where the fireball came from, stood Bowser's eight Koopalings, Ludwig, Larry, Roy, Wendy, Morton, Iggy, Lemmy, and Bowser Jr. "Aaah, Mario Mario!" Ludwig Von Koopa taunted, in his German accent. "You should have expected that we Koopas never play fair."

Mario grabbed the weakened Peach by the arm and ran away from the Koopalings, as they were outnumbering them six to two.

"Come on, chickees, let's get zem!" Ludwig called.

The octo-group of kids and the Chicken-Toads continued the chase after the plumber and the princess. Mario and Peach ran up a pink Triangular Block, which allowed them to run up the side of a cliff. Unfortunately, the Koopa Kids were doing the same thing, and the Chicken-Toads, being able to fly, were gaining on them! At the top of the cliff, there was a Star Road pad. Mario and Peach jumped onto the pad, and it warped them to the Star World.

Peach looked around the Star World. "We'd better hide in one of the levels before the Koopa Kids get here!"

Mario pointed at each of the five pipes that led to the levels of the Star World, in singsong. "Eeny-meeny-miney-Mario, this a-pipe... aw, forget it-a!"

They jumped into the Star World level pipe that was closest to where they were standing. They had just gone down the pipe when the Koopalings and the Chicken-Toads arrived.

"Aw man, we lost 'em!" whined Roy Koopa.

"They must've ducked into one of the levels here," suggested Bowser Jr.

Iggy Koopa started a question. "Shall we go..."

"...and get them?" Lemmy Koopa finished it.

"No, we'll just not tell King Dad that we lost zem," Ludwig planned. "So long as he never finds out they're not dead and/or captured, our scales are safe."

***

"Phew! We a-lost 'em!" Mario bubbled from underwater.

"Yeah, but we've still got trouble!" Peach said. "We're in Star World 2! We've got Cheep-Cheeps, Bloopers, Trouters, Berthas, and Torpedo Teds to worry about now."

"Great-a!" Mario said sarcastically. "And a-me without my Frog-a Suit."

Suddenly, a Rip Van Fish, who had been sleeping nearby, heard them talking and woke up. He gave chase after them.

"You're right-a!" Mario said, acknowledging what Peach said. "That-a Rip Van Fishy looks a-might peeved! Let's a-swim for it-a!"

The twosome swam away from the Rip Van Fish as fast as they could. Eventually, they came to a warp pipe that would lead them out of there, so they swam through it. When they came out of the pipe, they had landed in an underground cavern.

Mario sighed of relief. "Whew, safe at last!"

"_Lost_ at last is more like it." Peach looked around. "Where are we?"

"You got a-that right. I don't a-remember this-a part of Star World 2." Mario got up and sniffed at the bad-smelling air. "Eww-a! Do I detect a savory aroma of old-a gym socks-a?"

"It's coming from over there!" Peach pointed to a pipe on the other side of the cavern. A pile of garbage sat under the pipe, and more garbage was dropping out of it.

Mario walked over to the garbage pile. "Rotten-a fruit-a. Egg a-shells-a. It must-a be coming out of..." As he said this, he looked up into the pipe. A coconut shell fell in and landed on his head. "Eeeeyuck!"

"Pee-yew," Peach held her nose as Mario wiped the coconut juice off of his head. "It stinks like that horrible Scoopa Sauce of Bowser's. And if that's what it is, then this must be where Scoopa Koopa's sends its garbage. And that pipe must go right into the kitchen!"

Mario paced around Peach. "We can't a-just bust in-a. They'll a-be sure to French fry us-a!"

"You're right," Peach said. "We'll be sitting ducks! We need some help..."

"I think I can be of assistance," they heard a feminine voice say.

Mario and Peach looked around, trying to find the beholder of the voice. Then they looked up and saw who had spoken.

"Wanda!" Mario called out to the blonde-haired fairy. "Boy, it's a-nice to see a winged a-creature who isn't a-working for Bowser!"

[**Author's Note:** If you're confused, let me explain Wanda. She appeared in the Japanese-only Super Famicom game _Mario & Wario_, where it was her job to get Mario, Peach, or Yoshi to the end of a stage where Luigi would pull off a bucket that Wario had dropped on their head. Wanda also appeared in _ Wario's Woods_, where she dropped down bombs for Toad to clear away the monsters. She is _not_ the same Wanda from "The Fairly OddParents!"]

"What brings you here, Wanda?" Peach asked as Wanda healed her. "I thought you were working over at TMKTV."

TMKTV was the Mushroom Kingdom's regular television broadcasting station. Among the shows on the network was the popular animated sitcom "The Rather WeirdFolks". The show was about a boy named Quincy and his fairy godparents. Wanda played the part of the fairy godmother, Canday, and a Toad named Casual T. was the godfather, Wosmo. Wanda did an great performance as Canday, and being an actual fairy didn't hurt either.

"Oh, we just finished filming our latest episode," Wanda said. "You know how I've helped you in the past, and you may need my help again."

"True, true," Mario said. "But how did you know about the trouble with a-Bowser's restaurant?"

"I've been watching you since Bowser opened that stand," answered Wanda. "Now I know that the pipe over there leads to the kitchen, and I know that you're not prepared to bust in right now. That's where _I_ come in. Follow me!"

Mario and Peach followed Wanda through a doorway into another part of the cavern. In this part of the cavern, "?" Blocks galore floated in the air.

"Whoa!" Mario gasped at the overload of Blocks. "Thanks-a, Wanda!"

"Let's get bashing!" Peach said, walking over to a "?" Block. "Ladies first."

"Not if I a-beat you to the punch-a!" Mario ran ahead of Peach and bashed the 10-Coin Block repeatedly. Coins fell out of the 10-Coin Block until all ten of them were unloaded. "You know, Wanda," Mario said as he picked up the Coins, "with so many Blocks-a, where am I going to find a Power-Up-a?"

"Well, if you're looking for Power-Ups..." Wanda pointed her wand at a clear Block floating high up near a corner of the room. The Block was flashing a Super Mushroom, a Fire Flower, a Cape Feather, and a Starman. "Try that one up there!"

"A Roulette Block-a! Perfect-a!" Mario ran over to the Roulette Block and stood under it. "But I'll a-have to time it just right-a! Give me a boost-a, Wanda!"

With the help of Wanda's magic, Mario levitated up to the Roulette Block. He smashed it just as it was flashing a Cape Feather. Mario then grabbed the Feather and gained a Cape.

"Shall I accompany you up there?" Wanda said to the plumber and the princess.

"Good idea," Peach agreed. "Your magic may come in handy against the Koopas!"

Caped Mario stood in front of the pipe. "Ladies first?"

Some more garbage fell out of the pipe.

"Not on your life!" Peach and Wanda yelled, in unison.

"You don't have to shout-a..." Mario said, covering his ears.

***

Back at Scoopa Koopa's, innocent Chicken-people were still lining up to buy egg-flavored Scoopa Sauce-filled Corona Pockets, unknowing of the evil power it had over them.

And in the kitchen, Bowser, not knowing that his customers and kids had failed to capture or kill Mario and Peach, was walking around, giving orders to them. "Let's see some hustle! Move it!"

"Sir?" Kamek followed him. "I suggest we put plans for the fried chicken stand on hold. The customers haven't fully become Chickens, you see. And suppose Mario were to show up?"

"Don't be ridiculous, Kamek," Bowser scoffed to the Magikoopa. "My kids told me that he and that peachy princess I'm always capturin' are dead as a duo of doornails. Rex!! Hurry up with the special Scoopa Sauce on those Corona Pockets! The faster I can turn everyone in the Mushroom Kingdom into Chickens, the sooner I can make my next fortune!"

Suddenly, Caped Mario came flying out of the garbage pipe. "Health inspection!" he rallied, as Peach and Wanda climbed out behind him.

"What?!" Bowser was startled to see his archenemy still alive. "Ludwig! Larry! Roy! Wendy! Morton! Iggy! Lemmy! Junior! I thought you told me that Mario and Peach were as dead as a duo of doornails!"

"Well hey, it's..." Iggy started a sentence.

Lemmy finished it. "...not our fault."

"You always told us that..."

"...lying was an excellent trait."

"And so we lied!" Bowser Jr. added.

Mario executed a Super Spin Cape Attack, knocking out any Scoopa Koopa's employee who tried to attack. When he finished spinning, he pointed to his arch-foe and said, "You're a-next, Bowser!"

"Don't _egg_ me on, Mario!" Bowser picked up a Dino-Torch and fired.

Mario was able to jump out of the way before the Dino-Torch's fire could scorch him.

Peach picked up some coconuts and threw them at Bowser. "_Nuts_ to you, Bowser!"

The coconuts knocked Bowser's chef hat off of his head. "Yeowch!" The Koopa King turned to the Koopalings. "Kids, I think it's time we blasted off!"

"Wrong exit line," Ludwig pointed out.

"Oh. Well then, I think it's time to take the money and run!" Bowser grabbed what appeared to be a sack of money, and he and his kids jumped down a warp pipe, followed by some of their employees.

"Oh no!" Mario squealed. "Bowser a-got away with everyone's hard-earned a-money!"

"Not quite." Wanda pulled a sack, one that looked just like the one Bowser made off with, from behind her back and opened it up. Inside was all of the Coins that Bowser had made off of the restaurant.

"It's all the Coins-a!" Mario said, looking in the bag. "But how'd you get it away from a-Bowser?"

"I switched it with a fake one!" Wanda giggled.

Peach walked up to the Chickens, who were still sitting over the conveyor belt, and set them free. "I'm sending you where the pecking's good. You can be free-range Chickens from now on!"

Wanda followed Mario and Peach as they strolled out to the crowd in front of the stand. Luigi, Yoshi, Daisy, the Wario Bros., and everyone else were still Chickens.

"OK, Wanda, do your stuff-a!" Mario ordered.

Wanda waved her wand over the crowd. Instantly, all of the Chicken features on everyone vanished, and they all returned to normal.

"What's a-going on a-here?" Wario asked as he and Waluigi returned to normal.

"I feel like I spent all afternoon a-with a beak and wings-a!" Waluigi rubbed his head.

"Attention everyone!" Mario announced. "This joint is a-hereby closed by order of the Health Inspector-a!"

"WHAT?" Everyone in the crowd gasped.

"And a-just to make sure-a..." Mario started up a Super Spin Attack. He moved over to the Scoopa Koopa's stand and completely demolished it with a Mario Tornado. He then spun back over to the crowd and bounced a Megavitamin in his hand. "Now a-go home and a-eat some vegetables - Dr. Mario's orders!"

"Say, Wanda," Peach asked to the fairy as Mario was giving his speech, "what did you switch the bag of Coins with?"

"Let's just say it's something your long-time hero would hate to be stuck with himself," answered Wanda.

***

Soon, in Darkland, Bowser's eight kids were lugging the big sack as Bowser walked ahead of them.

"I can't believe it!" Bowser yelled at everyone as he sat down on his throne. "That pinheaded plumber defeated us again!! That's getting so monotonous! Well, at least there's an upside to this loss - I _still_ have all of the Mushroom Kingdom's money! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha haaa! OK, Junior, open the bag."

Junior untied the rope that was closing up the sack. But when he opened the sack, a really bad smell emitted from it. All eight Koopalings fainted from the bad smell. Bowser looked inside the sack and found...

"Egg shells?!!! **_CURSE YOU, MARIO MARIO!!!!!!_**"

***

Back at Mario and Luigi's House, Peach was serving healthy sandwiches to the Mario Bros., Yoshi, Toadsworth, and Daisy while Wanda floated above.

"I _really_ clucked like a chicken?" Yoshi asked. Peach and Wanda had just finished explaining what had happened to them.

"You and Luigi and Daisy as well, Yoshi!" Peach said.

"And I had my watchful eye on you all," Wanda finished the explanation. "And Bowser would've gotten away with turning all of you into Chickens if it weren't for little ol' me!"

Yoshi slurped up his sandwich. "Oh, I'm so embarrassed!"

"Well, that makes three of us, kiddo!" Luigi said, referring to himself, Daisy, and Yoshi. "Hey Mario, pass the veggies please."

"My pleasure!" Mario picked up a plate of carrots and turnips and got up to bring them to Luigi, but he slipped, and the plate crashed into the wall. "Oops, I just invented the tossed salad! Ha ha ha!"


End file.
